This is one of those difficult truths that all of us really need to be aware of. We as human beings tend to FEAR most what we most want. Connection, love, success and, in the case of my business, weight loss are all things we most fear yet most want.
I will give you an example from my own life. When I weighed 220 pounds one of the reasons I couldn’t reach my goal is because on some level I feared how different my life would be as a thin person. I had never been my ideal weight as an adult and I feared unwanted attention, rejection from my family, but mostly I feared what I didn’t know, what life would be like. Being thin turned out to be an adjustment, yes, but also amazing. I hope I never go back to the old way, but if I do I know I will still be ok.
In my business life, on some levels I have feared success. In my earlier careers, I often worked sixty-hour weeks with lots of travel. On some level, I fear success will bring back that much-hated schedule.
I fear my book doing well and losing my privacy, though intellectually I know that even if my book did do really well, it’s a book, not a TV show. I won’t be losing my privacy.
The thing is, these fears that we all have, which are very much unconscious, influence our actions on a daily basis. Things like not creating a Pinterest post today because “I just don’t feel like it” even though that gets you one step closer to connecting with a person, hopefully “persons,” who would read, love, and share what you are doing.
It’s so subtle, it’s insidious and we all do it. I bet if you really think about it you have probably made ten or so steps that actively take you away from reaching the goals in life that most scare you.
So how do we fix this?
It starts with awareness.
First, be aware of your goals and name them in very specific terms:
Example, weight 156.
Number of new followers on whatever social media platforms you are using.
Become a best-selling author. Yep, I want that and I am not going to pretend anymore that I don’t!!
Then awareness on some level of what scares the stuffing out of you and why.
Next, journal like crazy on why you feel that way, where it comes from, and how you can heal it.
Then: figure out your action steps to take you closer to the goal and do them anyway—even if you “just don’t feel like it.”
Spend time with your emotions, make friends with them but realize they are as real as the TV show you watched today rather than going for a workout and you have the power to control them.
So, get to work making your goals manifest while I go start on another Pinterest post.
Thanks for reading!!
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