& How to make them succeed
I love how New Year’s makes people think about what they like about their life but most importantly what they don’t like. It’s like a clean slate for most of us. But I already know that even though almost everyone makes at least some New Year’s resolutions, almost no one achieves any of them.
Why is that?
Most of us do New Year’s resolutions completely wrong. Here’s how.
Unrealistic goals: Every year I have a client or 10 who has a goal of quadrupling their salary in one year. Noble, yes, I love it, but if your unconscious mind doesn’t think it’s possible, it ignores it and you end up making less than last year. Better: Unless you have a solid proven plan start with 25% more or at most, double. The same is true for other goals like weight loss, 20 pounds in 20 days—not possible, even if you completely stopped eating. Your mind knows this so create something that does work.
Goals for things outside of your control: Salespeople are famous for creating goals that rely on other actions, like buying. Better: Make the effort the goal. Example: “80 sales calls a day” will get you more sales. Even for weight loss this is an issue; your body won’t always release the weight even when you do everything right. Make the effort the goal. Example: 3X a week at the gym, six clean eating days a week . . . something like that.
Not specific enough: “I want to feel better.” “I want to be healthier.” Your mind says, “Huh? Sure.” Better: “I want my LDL to be down to 100” or “I want to be able to run a mile in eight minutes.”
Goal will take too long to achieve: Going back to weight loss, “I want to lose 100 pounds in a year” is not a good goal. Even “Pay off my 30K debt” isn’t good if it will take a whole year. Better: Break it down into two- or three-month goals and reevaluate. Personally, I like to create new goals on the first day of every odd-numbered month and reevaluate them on the last of every even-numbered month, usually over coffee with a friend, a highly effective tool for change.
Not having a reward system: Inside of each of you is a little boy or girl who wants a reward for their hard work. An incentive. Think about much harder you work when you think you will get a bonus. And trust me, “not feeling bad” or “not being poor” is not enough of a reward. It needs to be something positive. A non-food reward is a key to success with your goals. Personally, I love cash. Even when one of my goals was to save money, I rewarded myself with cash when I reached it.
Plan for breaks in your goals: Let’s be real. You will each have something with chocolate or alcohol on Valentine’s Day, New Year’s, and Christmas. Your “resolutions” don’t stand a chance against a party with all your friends. If you get mad at yourself when you give in, then you will turn one night into a two-week food bender. Better: plan for your breaks and plan on enjoying them. Your goals will still be waiting for you the next day. I promise.
Not anchoring your goals in the unconscious: Imagine yourself throwing seeds out into the yard. How many of those would you expect to sprout and grow? Not many I assume. Now imagine if instead you planted those seeds into the earth and allowed the earth to nourish them in its natural place. Now how many? Much more. Creating a surface goal without embedding your goals deep in the unconscious mind is like tossing the seeds into the backyard and expecting them to grow. If you plant them by thinking about them while in a meditative state, nourish them with visualization and daydreaming then they will have a very good chance to grow. If you need help, try doing my 8-step self-hypnosis process.
Just know that achieving your New Year’s goals (resolutions) is possible if you adjust your approach, get some help, and create smaller, more manageable goals. After all, the key to building a really amazing house is to start with a solid foundation.
**If you are interested in getting more insight into what your 2020 will look like, my intuitive readings now have their own page. To book an intuitive reading visit:
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Know that you are loved.
Jill K Thomas CHT
Soul Connect Hypnotherapy
Author of the books “Tales from the Trance” & “Feed your Real Hunger”
Appointments available Globally by Video Chat